Talking to kids about disasters

Should you protect your kids from bad news or prepare them to hear it?

Mon, Mar 14 2011 at 7:04 AM

Related Topics:

Natural Disasters, Education, Earthquake News, Hurricane

Sept. 11, Hurricane Katrina, Haiti and now Japan. As much as we'd like to prevent them, catastrophic disasters occur. And as much as we'd like to protect our kids from the news about such tragedies, more often than not, they hear enough from news snippets and pieces of adult conversation to know that something terrible has happened.

According to the American Red Cross, it's better to talk to kids directly about disasters than to try to hide what's going on:

"You should not worry that talking about disasters will make children fearful. On the contrary, children are usually more frightened by what is whispered or not mentioned aloud than by matter-of-fact discussion."

So how can you talk to your kids about disasters without scaring them?

Be open, be honest, be comforting, and most importantly, be age-appropriate. Your toddler may guess that Mommy and Daddy are sad when they watch the news, but she probably doesn't need to hear all of the terrible details about what is happening in Japan right now. Instead, you can just confirm that something sad did happen and reassure her that she and her family are safe.

Once kids hit school-age though, it is more than likely that they will hear details about the news from teachers and friends, so it's better to prepare them with the truth so they don't become frightened by rumors. Talk about what happened and be prepared to answer any questions your grade-schooler may have about the tragedy.

It's also a good idea to monitor screen time (computer, television and smartphone) immediately after a disaster occurs so your kids don't become overwhelmed with the news coverage of the incident.

It would be wonderful if there never was another disaster like Sept. 11, 2001, or the recent earthquake and tsunami in Japan. But the odds are that there will be. We can only protect our kids from the news for so long. Sooner or later, we have to prepare them to hear about it.

The opinions expressed by MNN Bloggers and those providing comments are theirs alone, and do not reflect the opinions of MNN.com. While we have reviewed their content to make sure it complies with our Terms and Conditions, MNN is not responsible for the accuracy of any of their information.

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Comment: 1

YLT Apr 13 2011 at 2:09 PM

The article states "Talk about what happened and be prepared to answer any questions your grade-schooler may have about the tragedy. " I would strongly urge all parents to do additional research and not just rely on headline news stories. Your local librarian or the Internet library on-line can help. For example, I have been following the situation at the Fukushima plant closely. Many commentors, including some who identify themselves as parents, have no clue as to the meaning of radiation

.... More

levels and are just scared. Well, there is plenty of information on-line which I found so others could too. The same information is available for radiation readings and potential fixes to the problems. As a baby boomer, I grew up with the threat of nuclear war and was just outside a "kill zone" for the blast so we were taught how to protect ourselves from the initial radiation (alpha particles) as well the gamma radiation that would follow. Apparently some children grew up with fear, I did not because my parents expressed confidence in their ability to cope. As an adult, I doubt they felt the confidence the portrayed, but I know first hand that it makes a difference. Accordingly, I would also stongly urge parents not to express their own misgivings about the confidence they have in the ability of the state and federal government to respond. That only creates unnecessary worry for a child who can do nothing to remedy the situation. For distance crisis, redirect the children to preparation for a local emergency. Have the children gather and maintain their own 3 and 14 day survival kits. This helps the child feel control over an unexpected crisis. A toddler can learn his "special" backpack (packed by an adult) but a 12 year old should be able to follow the prepared lists on the internet and accept responsibility for the preparation.