Stuff Environmentalists Like
The first installment in your beginner's guide to befriending and exploiting green people.
Illustration by Leif Parsons 
Step One: Bringing numerous talking points to dinner
More reading from the Guide:
Part 2: Brainwashing children
Part 3: Being depressed by statistics
Part 4: Knowing which ingredients in your shampoo will kill you
Part 5: Never throwing stuff away
Comments
Many of these eco-wackos think that our SUVs and backyard BBQs cuase global warming becuase they have been watching too many marathons of that stupid CAPTIAN PLANET cartoons and they have lost touch and are ranting wackos in need of a brain scan
HE HE HE ENVIROMENTALISTS WACKOS TASTE LIKE CHICKEN HE HE HE S2QUAWK,SQUAWK UUURRRPPP BURP
With last years oil spill incedent some eco-wackos have been riding their bicycles but the facts are that in their own instruction books for maneence instructs them to keep the axeles and chain well oiled
Good God folks. If you cant have a good laugh at some silly and fun satire just hang it up right now! Not every single thing need be earth shattering at every moment.
I know, I know, saving the earth is serious work, and only YOU can do it. But for ****'s sake, if you can't laugh at yourself you have lost all sense of your own humanity.
Real nature would scare the heck out of those ignornt flatlanders I mean nature dont work like a disney film
They sit in front of their TVs like mindless zombies watching their stupid CAPTIAN PLANET marathons on EARTHDAY
For those who don't know this, the article was written by the very funny guy who does the "Stuff White People Like" blog...so this article is actually meant to poke fun. Seeing how upset everybody here seems to be, I would like to suggest that the next "Stuff white people like" entry should be "Spending tons of time commenting on blog posts and getting totally bent out of shape in the process".
S.W.P.L.com already has a section lamenting white 'Offence'. It's under the heading '#101 Being Offended'. Perhaps for book 2 (oh yes he missed some stuff) Mr. Lander could include a segment on 'Not Getting the Joke'.....As a proud white person or Wrong Kind of White Person, I love that someone is finally taking the piss out of White culture in a humorous and clever way. I've never had so much fun laughing at myself.....Keep it up.
This is so funny. Environmentalists all deserve to be killed. I say, we round them all up and set fire to them using a huge aerosol blowtorch. That would really show them! While we're at it, lets make lots of babies. Don't even think about what their lives will be like as they age, just make the babies, and ignore the fact the water tables are decreasing, acidity levels in the oceans are rising, and anyone who tries to use sustainable methods to grow their food gets overrun by corporate.... More
It is ignoramuses like you who will eventually lead this world into a state of decline!!! Your type really makes me puke, you vacuous, coffee-nosed, malodorous, pervert… Whilst I do see the humour in befriending “greenies” to take advantage of free soap and garden produce, the menacing threat of ignorant chardonnay swilling swine and their bourgeoisie attitudes in the face of climate change and global warming and all that they will bring to humanity is to say the least very poor form!.... More
If you think this is offensive, you obviously have no sense of humour or are a moron.
Either way you shouldn't be reading it.
The whole premise is insulting from line 1. "Choosing one's friends is a weighty endeavor that can yield significant benefits"?? ie. using people? real estate agents Not that I actually believe someone would befriend an environmentalist to take his light bulbs.
I would. Those things are 'spensive....And now that some enviro-nazi bureaucrat made them mandatory, I think I'll befriend several environmentalists in case one dies and I can't get my light bulbs anymore...Lighten Up!!!!!!!
hahahahaha or we could accept that were animals and were supposed to run our course and not worry about the earth. the earth is for our sustenance and when we place too much of a load on it, our population will be reduced or eliminated and the next species will take our place. environmentalists are idiots
The most irresponsible comment i've ever read
When I was a kid, I once asked Mom why Presbyterians don't evangelize. She said, "We do. Through action." I'm no longer a Presbyterian by any means (as Mr. Lander expressed once, paraphrased, White People Like Religions to which their Parents do not Belong, right?), but I feel that there is something to be gained by activism through action.
Maybe it's one thing to wax eloquent on the deteriorating condition of the world. It produces converts and money that can be well-spent making a.... More
