5 really dumb cars
Terrible ideas were rampant in the late 1980s and early '90s — including one that Time magazine called 'the Mona Lisa of bad cars.'
SHORT LIFE: A Renault Fuego in better days. (Photo courtesy Renault) 
Renault Fuego: The styling was so avant that these actually looked kind of cool for five minutes as long as they were clean and revolving on a show stand. Definitely a trip upscale from the spartan Le Car, but not in a good way. The Fuego shared its drivetrain with the unloved Renault 18 (I almost bought one of those, but that’s another story), and was designed by the same guy who did the ill-selling Citroen SM. French cars are always quirky, but this one (briefly sold in the U.S. between 1982 and 1985 by American Motors dealers) was never going to appeal to stateside buyers. Car and Driver had fun with one, though, describing the body as looking like “a walrus with gas.” No wonder French cars have been off the market since 1992.
Yugo: A brand-new car for less than $5,000 — that was importer Malcolm Bricklin’s mantra. And it worked, at least as first. Until people actually drove them for a while, Yugos sold fairly well in the U.S. But the Yugo was the product of the finest communist-era engineering that gave us the Trabant, and it was truly awful. I once drove a convertible version around the Lime Rock race track, so it’s remarkable that I’m still here to tell about it. I once asked a Yugo rep about all the windshield cracks, and he said it was from the seatback hitting the glass when angled forward. An ’85 GL makes Time’s list of 50 “Worst Cars of All Time.” They called it “the Mona Lisa of bad cars.” The rear-window defroster at least kept your hands warm when you pushed the car. Bricklin later ran into trouble trying to import Chinese cars. He offered to take me out for a drink once. I’m ready, Mal.
Cadillac Allanté: The Allanté (the accent was an affectation) had the virtue of at least being good-looking, but it was never a good idea. GM engineers have tried to explain the “land bridge” concept by which the Cadillac bodies were flown from builder Pininfarina in Italy (hence the good looks) 3,300 miles to Detroit’s then-decrepit Hamtramck plant where they now build the Volt. They called it “the world’s longest assembly line,” as if that was a virtue, when in fact it resulted in the car costing $54,000 — with GM losing money on all of them. They’re not making money on the electric Volt, either, but that’s at least for a good cause. The Chrysler TC was financially prudent compared to this. The Allanté sold about half of projections, so it was lucky to last from 1987 to 1993. I drove one at the time, and recall a fast and memorable drive down I-95 with the Butterfield Blues Band blaring “East-West” on what was truly a killer stereo. Thanks for the memories, Cadillac.
Chrysler TC by Maserati: After being given a pep talk by Lee Iacocca in all his glory, I was handed the keys to one of these at the company headquarters in bombed-out Highland Park (soon abandoned for suburban Auburn Hills). This 1989 entry was an insane, doomed effort to add some class to what was one of the worst-ever American car lineups. K Car, anyone? The TC styling was all Chrysler, and hideous in the country club, opera window style of the period. The engine was Chrysler, too, but with a “Maserati” cylinder head. And, with a purchase price of $33,000, they weren’t going to move many. Sales said it all: From a high of 3,764 in 1989, volume fell to 1,636 in the last year of 1991.
Pontiac Aztek: In his book on GM’s missteps, "Sixty to Zero," Alex Taylor III of Fortune gives pride of place to the Aztek, which he says “seemed to have been dropped to earth from outer space.” Offered by the doomed Pontiac brand from 2001 to 2005, the angular, mismatched Aztek so overused decorative “body cladding” (as a substitute for actual styling) it sent design guru Bob Lutz on an anti-cladding campaign. The Aztek was a mid-sized crossover designed by committee, and nobody at GM seems to have actually looked at it before it rolled down the assembly line. The British Telegraph named the Aztek to its “100 Ugliest Cars” list. And why couldn’t they spell “Aztec” right?| Previous Post Electric car rentals start next week | Next Post 6 things I learned about the Nissan Leaf |
Comments
Need I say more?
I had an '82 citation with an '84 engine. For the money I had put into it, I could have bought a brand new car with no payments. My aunt had a 81 and had no problems. Mine was the lemon in the group. My dad, who worked for GM, said it was a great car. It spent more time getting repaired than driven. When 2nd engine locked up we traded it for a '76 Chevy Nova that was old but got us from A to B.
I drove a pinto wagon 200,000 miles. Actually used it as a service vehicle in the A/C trade. Drove it from SC to Nebraska on vac. in 1977. Never got less than 30 mpg. As far as the gas tank problem, people die every day with lung cancer and liver disease, yet supidity will not allow outlawing ciggs and booze. Wish I still had the pinto!!!!!!!
I drove a pinto wagon 200,000 miles. Actually used it as a service vehicle in the A/C trade. Drove it from SC to Nebraska on vac. in 1977. Never got less than 30 mpg. As far as the gas tank problem, people die every day with lung cancer and liver disease, yet supidity will not allow outlawing ciggs and booze. Wish I still had the pinto!!!!!!!
ye ye ye we all know that you don't know that taste may differ.......
Did anyone ever look at one? If they did they would see that the Aztek is almost an exact styling copy of the Mercedes SUV of the same years -even down to the slant of front windshield pillars and the size and the profile. This was not styling by committee- it was styling by plagiarism. The identical Mercedes design was not laughed at because it has the 3 pointed star on it. I had one which I sold and now I have 2 more. Teens love it and say its ultra-cool. It holds more than most vans for.... More
Did anyone ever look at one? If they did they would see that the Aztek is almost an exact styling copy of the Mercedes SUV of the same years -even down to the slant of front windshield pillars and the size and the profile. This was not styling by committee- it was styling by plagiarism. The identical Mercedes design was not laughed at because it has the 3 pointed star on it. I had one which I sold and now I have 2 more. Teens love it and say its ultra-cool. It holds more than most vans for.... More
I seem to remember several cars from American motors that looked better as beehives.
got a A in the course.....but we obviously did not look at the gas tank setting on fire...what a mistake that was ..it was a lemon for sure....i still have my framed certificate from Ford embarrassed to hang it on my wall at home or in the office.....it stays in the attic
what about the "PINTO" when i was in college Ford came to our campus at La Salle University in Philly we got to evaluate the car for a month as part of a seminar marketing course...formed a task force six of us with different responsibilities I was on the questionnaire committee, we each drove the car around all over town for a week set up driving times for prospective student customers, evaluation meetings etc.....we thought it was a cool car wrote up a great case study the whole nine yards.... More
I got the car used in 1971 a graduation/college present i was so cool and then the repairs started..the struts, front end alignment ...fuel pump...new carb, the tranny slipping...my 8 track screwed up started sucking in the tape and on and on
Corvair, unsafe oil leaker; K car,cheap unsafe car;
Best is the Suburban, can haul a load of people, their gear, and pull a trailer just about anywhere. Well balanced and stable on or off the road.
F***ing
Old
Rebuilt
Dodge
Crappy Poor Crappy Government
*** old Handling Motors
Motors Numbskull Every Crap
And Thinks Valve
Rebuilt It's Rattles
Often A Oil
Car Leaks
Engines
.... More
Crappy Poor Crappy Government
*** old Handling Motors
Motors Numbskull Every Crap
And Thinks Valve
Rebuilt It's Rattles
Often A Oil
Car Leaks
Engines
.... More
I love how you slam the Aztek (citing its body cladding) and show an example with no cladding. Same for the Fuego, you show the French version not the US version. How about dumb cars that sell in big numbers like the Hummer or the Prius? And only one of these cars was sold this century? Dumb article is what the title should be.
Need I say more? Chevy's answer to the Yugo. Just as unreliable and equally useless.
I've owned my Aztek for 7 years now, It's been all over the U.S and Canada, and to work and back everyday. The car is 100% solid reliable. Just needs gas and oil changes as needed, and a new set of tires and transmission fluid replacement every 50,000 miles. I like the way it looks It's unique. Different than the no-style boxes like Explorer, 4runner, Pilot, etc. The Toyota Sequoia is the biggest ugliest overstuffed pig on the road, butt ugly and a gas hog too.
I still love my Aztek..... More
Well, this car could not have missed the list. While I appreciate the Aztek owners lining up to defend this gorgeous vehicle, how can you resist? If anyone of us were unfortunate enough to fork out money for one of those things, you'd defend your horrible purchase 'til: 1. you sell the vehicle (good luck) 2. you total it in a crash (better luck) 3. you die (at least you don't have to see it in your driveway anymore.
My mother bought a 73 AMC Gremlin (purple) and when my grandad saw it, he bought a Black and white one the next yr (74) to drive back and forth to work at Ford Motor Company in Dearborn, MI. He gave me his car in 81 when I was in high school. All I have to say is that both cars were a POS. What I remember most was those cars had major rust problems. My mom's was repo'ed, and the one I inherited was total crap. I recalled driving to school holding/pulling an extention cord to keep the.... More
I owned a 2000 Chevy Blazer. At the time it was the newest vehicle I've ever owned and by far the biggest POS!! It was rear wheel drive only, and it was a two door. For being a big vehicle you couldn't get anyone into the back seat. It broke down regularly and had a ton of electricial problems. The gas gauge never worked and the dash was made of cheap plastic and sounded like it was going to fall off the the car every time I hit a bump. Not to mention that hitting a bump in the road felt like I.... More
Drove a 95 blazer ($d) for 180000 mil wish I had not given it away. Tough, confortable,l etc.
Pontiac Fiero was great looking and Sporty , but had numerous problems. Two of my high scholl friends owned them, and I was always driving them places due to breakdowns.
Now folks the car that really stunk was the Cimarron. not that it was basically a chevy cavilier with leather seats, not that it had a dinky engine that was prone to over heat. No not that it had cramped legroom for a caddy. no! it was just too bloody expensive!!! i rather have had the fleetwood and dealt with the gas prices than mess with that tiny POJ come on a SMALL Cadillac? there is your oxymoron for ya. like calling shrimp jumbo......
The Chevy Vega with the aluminum block. I had a GT Hatchback. Great looking car, like a little Comaro. I put too big tires on it and on a rainy day it hydro-planed like a racing boat. A very light car. You didn't ask about the gas mileage, you asked how many quarts of oil you burned per mile.
I bought a 71 Vega GT in the fall of 73, (at my G friends insistance). It had more than a few things go wrong. Christmas of that year we went to her Grandmas. From Mpls.MN to S.Dakota. Driving in a Blizzard the exhaust got torn off and with the snow so deep we didn't dare stop. Another instance, I thought I had thrown a crankshaft bearing from the noise under the hood. upon looking, the bad engine vibration had worn out the alternator bracket and the 5/8th" bolt had unscrewed and was sticking.... More
Yeah paid $15 for a vega, then spent $100 on the engine. Gave it my sister, who called me two weeks later and told that she refused to speak to me until I got that POS out of her driveway! The engine and 2 wheel bearings had seized up! Never bought another vega after that debacle!
Love my little Aztek- mine is the sunshine yellow. Not bad gas mileage, fun to drive and i have no issues with it. =)
Lots of people hammer the Aztek when they have never been in one.
How many drivers and owners are disappointed with their purchase?
Very, very few/
what about the fox? god, i had one, my first car was an 87, had no idea what i was buying, but it was CHEAP. hated hated hated this car..... i walked more than i rode!
It's not the cars that are dumb, it's the writer. The Fuego styling was a refreshing break from the boxy BMWs and Celicas! And it used the tried and true Renault 18i chassis and motor, some with turbo. Sensational!!
And the Yugo wasn't dumb, it was EXACTLY what it claimed to be, a cheap, little car. And it was FUN at last, in a sea of dull-as-dishwater Hyundai's!
The Aztek was strange looking, but the writer, like most people, thinks strange is another word for wrong. In that.... More
As an editorial post it isn't inappropriate and that is all this is--one person's view of 5 cars he feels were dumb. It's not unlike any other list that people make every day--5 best movies, the five dumbest books, the top 10 party schools, the dumbest fashion trends of all time.
My father was a Renault fan and I was just thinking about Yugos recently. On the other hand--that odd boxy car that is popular right now looks to me about as dumb as boys wearing their pants around their knees..... More
It doesn't matter what the nameplate says, you need to keep up on maintenance! I have a 99 Ranger, with 161,000 miles and the thing has been across the country twice - I have kept up on routine maintenance, and the thing runs like a champ!
Beautiful car... but had to replace engines in both of the ones I owned. The Quad 4 engine's air intake was below the driver's side headlight. There was a small hole there to let condensation out....but if you ever drove over a deep puddle...it would suck water up into the firing chambers and bend the crap out of the pistons...Someone didn't think that one though
Best Car I ever owned. It may not have been plush inside, it made have been noisy, but every part of that car could be replaced in a parking lot with just a pair of pliers and a screwdriver. It was cheap to fix and lasted till the floor rusted out at 160K. No matter what you say, that is the way cars should have been. It made life in college great!!! Thanks Mustang! Thanks Ford
I had 3 pintos. My first one thru a rod to my negligence. I wish i had one now.
Best car I ever had - except for the mechanicals. My daugter had one too - and it was voted the best "raft Dude" car - it could carry 5 fully inflated rafts to the river. Too bad it wasn't built in the USA instead of Mexico - it would have been more reliable. It had great room, fun driver's console, comfortable seats .... It certainly was a better sportsman type car than the Suberu could ever hope to be. The Aztek got a bad rap - and certainly by people who never owned or drove one for any.... More
I had a Corvair wagon, so I guess that trumps everyone else's Bad Car stories. It made the regular Corvair look like a Bimmer or Volvo. BTW: ta for the Allante review, it reminded me of one of my favorite blues riffs from Back When: "East-West." Zipped over to You Tube and downloaded dat kine.
Had 2 of them in my life; a 1986 Chrysler Laser and a 1982 LeBaron. Both massively underpowered...in the LeBaron you found yourself unconsciously leaning forward when you accelerated. The Laser had moderately more power, but still could have used more engine. However, I was a kid and chances are I would have done damage had I had a more powerful vehicle before I had good sense. But would be nice if today you could get a modestly priced car without breaking your budget, for those who really.... More
Bought it used with 99k miles and it is still running! Unfortunately with another owner who says it is running like a little champ!
Yes they are ugly, but my Aztek is currenty at 270,000 miles and still going. I love it and it runs as smooth as it did 10 years ago. However, the dealership said don't get into an accident because there are no collision parts out there for it. Just my luck I'll hit a squirrel and total the thing!
Am I the only one that actually liked the way they looked? I am glad I didnt buy one...but I drive a Nissan Juke now, so I think the Aztec was just ahead of its time. If it came out in 2010 people would drive it.
I made the mistake of buying one for my wife in 86....Almost ended up in divorce court over this car! Paid $7,000 for it new and sold it two years later for $1,300 bucks. minus the dents in the hood from simply opening and closing. And dont forget the shattered window for closing the door too hard in 20 degree weather. We use to joke...dont park it too close to any dumpsters, or it might be mistaken for trash.
My how things have changed for Hyundai! They are no longer trash or a joke. They are among the best cars on the road now. I own a 2011 Elantra and it is a great car! And the Hyundai Sonata is another great automobile.
Absolute worst POS car I've ever owned (and sadly I've owned quite a few POS's)
Died on me 4 times within the first two weeks I had it, replaced alternator, belts, hoses, sparkplugs---you name it, I replaced it. That car fishtailed like crazy (even with brand new tires and very little rain doing about 10 mph through my friend's development). [fyi: I have not fishtailed in another car since]. The car would take about 20 minutes to get up to 45 mph.
Just pure non-sense. As the other reply mentioned, how can you fishtail a FWD car unless you damaged the car or your rear tires.
well, i own a neon (insert joke here lol) and bought it a few months ago. well, the guy said he replaced the brakes all around, i drove it 3 hours home (yea, i actually like neons!) and fishtailed when i barely touched the brakes at about 10 mph. almost totalled a brand new f-250 and teh neon. all due to a broken spring on the back brake.dumped my sideways and bout had a heartattack. next, time i promise i will check the brakes before buying, even if it means kneeling down in 18 inches of snow..... More
inquiring minds.....
