The Onion does it again! If fast-food ads touting greasier, gigantic-er, and generally grosser meals make you gag instead of salivate, you’ll love this spoof video: Domino’s Scientists Test Limits of What Humans will Eat.
“Domino’s scientists found that decreasing the nutritional value and increasing the visual repulsiveness of their pizzas only makes them more popular,” says a straight-faced news reporter. A scientist then reveals all manner of disgusting pizzas — like a crust topped with crushed Oreos, drizzled with a white waxy substance.
I found out about this video at Salon, where Francis Lam has his own spoof revealing “corporate designs on the future of our fatness.” Plans include Pinkberry’s Extra-Natural™, Negative-Calorie yogurt (“A yogurt that will turn the digestive system against its owner and eat itself from the inside out”) and Backyard Burgers’ new Briquette Burger (“a half-pound of beef, smothered in real cheddar cheese and charcoal ashes. Because you’re man enough to eat the burger that fell through the grate.”)
What do you find funnier: This Domino’s spoof, the Taco Bell spoof (green, because it’s all vegan — because no ingredients come from nature!), or Taco Bell’s Drive-Thru Diet ad — which actually isn’t a spoof! If the suggestion that you can lose weight by eating cheese-like-substance-laden fried foods while sitting in your car makes you skeptical, rest assured that Taco Bell’s fine print says “results not typical.”