Pop-culture expert writes about entertainment, arts — and the occasional zombie.
You likely don't need this $24,000 zombie survival kit
Z.E.R.O. (Zombie Extermination, Research and Operations) Kit by OpticsPlanet is feature-rich but massive.
Tue, Jul 10, 2012 at 11:45 AM
In the 2009 hit film "Zombieland," the #7 rule to surviving the zombie apocalypse (as expressed by Jesse Eisenberg's character) is to always "travel light." After all, with the #1 rule being "Cardio," you don't want a cache of heavy items slowing you down while the undead are nipping at your heels.
So, unless you're planning on staying put and digging in somewhere, you probably won't want to thrown down $24,000 on OpticsPlanet's Z.E.R.O.
(Zombie Extermination, Research and Operations) Kit. This absolutely massive selection of gear and accessories is phenomenal — but you'll need a truck.
Some of the items you'll receive include BlackHawk SOLAG Gloves (to punch zombies and avoid teeth marks), thermal and night-vision goggles, a foldable Solaris Solar Power Charging Mat, Zombie Apocalypse Knife from Browning, OPMOD Battle Mug (for smashing in skulls while enjoying the world's last coffee beans), and (hilariously enough), a lab kit for finding a cure to the zombie virus. From the site:
"We've included Qorpak Beakers, Labnet Pipettes and a Celestron Microscope so you can take samples and study the innermost workings of zombies. The destructive nature of their cells might lead you to a better understanding of their life expectancy or how to possibly treat their symptoms so they no longer hunger for human flesh."
One more thing: There are no guns included, but the assumption is that you'll likely be able to find one easily enough once the apocalypse starts. And don't forget rule #2: Double-tap
You can check out the full selection of items in OpticsPlanet's Z.E.R.O. kit on their site
The opinions expressed by MNN Bloggers and those providing comments are theirs alone, and do not reflect the opinions of MNN.com. While we have reviewed their content to make sure it complies with our Terms and Conditions, MNN is not responsible for the accuracy of any of their information.