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    What's this?
Why I'm escaping the holidays this year
I'm not celebrating Christmas or Thanksgiving (and I may skip New Year's too), and that's OK.
Tue, Nov 27 2012 at 9:16 AM
 22
A mug that reads "Bah Humbug"

Photo: Bob the Berto/Flickr

Go ahead, call me crazy. Or antisocial. I don't mind, because I'll be over here feeling relaxed for the first holiday season since I can remember. And frankly, that's just more important to me these days.
 
Now, don't get me wrong; I'm not anti-holidays, and I'm not suggesting that everyone should follow my lead. But I do think that maybe holidays shouldn't be socially mandatory — that if you want to sit a year out here and there, that should be just fine, even a normal part of life. 
 
Most of my life, I truly loved Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's and all that came along with them. I found great joy in Christmas music, stuffing myself silly for two days straight at Thanksgiving, buying and/or making and wrapping presents, finding just the right tree and decorating it with the bulbs that are my family heirlooms. I almost always partied my old year out and my new year in, toasting as I voyaged through decades. But this year, my heart just hasn't been in it. The idea of engaging in all that work feels pointless, since I'm not really excited to do any of it. 
 
It took me some time (a whole year between last year and this one), but I no longer feel guilty about it. I've celebrated these holidays, and I will enjoy them again (maybe even more so once I've skipped them a couple of times). But this year, I'm out.
 
I already skipped any kind of traditional Thanksgiving, opting instead for a low-key vacation with my boyfriend. I spent Thanksgiving Day getting lots of sunshine and drinking a spiked banana smoothie on the beach, having great conversation with the person who is my favorite conversationalist in the world, and walking the streets of an ancient colonial Caribbean town. All of which would be lovely at any time of year, but was especially so because I wasn't eating a bunch of mediocre "holiday" food, I didn't have to drive or sit in traffic, I didn't have to do any work (cooking, cleaning or entertaining), and I could actually fully enjoy the day, giving thanks at least once an hour for the ability to make an alternative choice. It was the best Thanksgiving I've had in more than a decade. 
 
I had already been thinking about ignoring Christmas, but my Thanksgiving experience solidified my choice; no stressful present-finding, no dealing with a tree, no holiday entertaining for me this year (though I'm always happy to attend others' shindigs for a drink or two). I'll take those days off and head to Vermont where I will read, hike, sleep in and (hopefully) watch the snow fall. Sounds like the best kind of celebration to me. And New Year's? We'll see. But right now, I'm planning an 11:30 bedtime on December 31st. 
 
I'm looking forward to celebrating the winter holidays again next year, but this year? I'll be celebrating freedom of choice, doing it a bit differently, making conscious choices about my own life — and getting a bit of peace and quiet. 
 
What do you think? Would you take a year off from the holidays? 
 
Related holiday stories on MNN:
  • 5 signs you're heading for a holiday breakdown
  • Why relaxing is stressful for some people
 
MNN tease photo of woodcut: Shutterstock
 

The opinions expressed by MNN Bloggers and those providing comments are theirs alone, and do not reflect the opinions of MNN.com. While we have reviewed their content to make sure it complies with our Terms and Conditions, MNN is not responsible for the accuracy of any of their information.

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Comments: 22
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anonymous
jkv Dec 03 2012 at 3:51 PM

I feel bad for all of you quitters. By ignoring it you do nothing but make yourselves look bitter and disillusioned. Isn't there some way to save the spirit of the season and not drop out of the world? Someday you might really be lonely and alone...why not enjoy the people you do have now while you still can?

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anonymous
Wendy Dec 03 2012 at 12:34 PM
Seems to me that you aren't skipping the holidays as much as celebrating them in a nontraditional manner. Those who treat the day like any other day are skipping the holiday. But if you take the opportunity to go on a trip or do something else out of the ordinary, well you are still acknowledging the holiday. Go for it if it makes you happy (and while I am a holiday junkie the degree to which I go all out depends on me and my attitude and my family and circumstances that year - it ebbs and flows
.... More
across the years).
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anonymous
Danielle Dec 03 2012 at 9:25 AM
I don't celebrate the holidays for religious reasons. However, this also means that I am free of the stress, expense, and slavery associated with them. People tell me they wish they didn't celebrate them, either, and I say, so why do you? They can't even tell me. Our children learn that giving is done from the heart when you feel you want to, not out of obligation or entitlement. They know we don't lie to them- they know there's no Santa Claus, and they trust us more as a result. It's a win- win.
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anonymous
Nunuvum Dec 03 2012 at 9:21 AM

There is a small, but growing, FB community of people that feel the same way - http://www.facebook.com/pages/Nunuvum-pronounced-as-none-of-em/152638841...

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anonymous
Hannah Dec 03 2012 at 8:46 AM

I love you!! I have not "celebrated" any holidays since 2001 and I love it!!! Waste of money and time, and for what? Everyone else can go knock themselves out; I prefer peace and quiet!

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anonymous
Cap'n Rita Dec 03 2012 at 8:42 AM

So, let me get this straight. You're dipping out on Holiday social obligations but more than willing to accept invitations from those who elect to spend the usual time, money and energy? Self-absorbed much?

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anonymous
N. Dow Dec 03 2012 at 8:08 AM

This will be my second season of ignoring the holidays.

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anonymous
F. Schrodinger Dec 03 2012 at 6:59 AM

Can I join you PLEASE! I’m soooo sick of the buy buy buy and the repetitive music (melt all the sleigh bells into bullets and shoot out the canned music.) Your coffee mug says it all. If you don't practice this nonsense, you're a scrooge. You can't win.

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anonymous
Jay Schwartz Dec 03 2012 at 3:37 AM
Nice sentiments, but in all honesty, is there really any reason you can't do what you're suggesting on any set of days or weekend during the year? Relatedly, is there really only ONE day a year on which to give thanks? Aren't you still overglorifying the 'holidays' by making a statement about these days in particuar? Try doing the same a few weeks from now or a few months from now; it will feel just as peaceful and glorious. The holidays' arrival are not good enough reason to wake-up, de-stress and
.... More
enjoy life a bit more simply or serenely.
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anonymous
Hannah Dec 03 2012 at 8:50 AM

Give thanks for what? Most of us break our butts earning whatever we may have through hard work. And you have missed the whole point. The stupid holidays (thanx to the media) put pressure on the whole planet to smile and play and shop and decorate. The average weekand does not! Enough already. I'm with her. I have ignored every stupid holiday that came down the pike since 2001. Bah humbug, Much, much , much better! No stress and no expense!

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anonymous
Jay Schwartz Dec 03 2012 at 9:15 AM
A) I agree with the author, for the most part, so I think you've missed the point of my comment. We shouldn't need the holidays to motivate us to action, inaction or even reaction. B) The average weekend is what YOU make of it. Screw the media. Forget about what everyone else is doing and just focus on making the most of the time you have in this life. It's your life, afterall. C) Yes, work sucks. I agree. That's the way it goes. D) If you truly have nothing to be thankful for in your life ... then
.... More
I'm sure anyone who has ever loved you will be more than willing to pinch you ... or perhaps even rake you over the 'yule log'. Wake up.
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anonymous
Guest Dec 03 2012 at 12:48 AM

Wholeheartedly AGREE! Instead of the usual, we gave to 'Sandy', the hungry, & to the unemployed. Feel so much better about GIVING to those in need. Wishing all of you: "HealthWealth"!

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svartan's picture
Starre Vartan Dec 03 2012 at 12:22 PM

Being based in the NYC area, THANK YOU for giving to Sandy relief. I was, thankfully, unaffected, but it's been rough for many people who already had so little.

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anonymous
Amy Dec 02 2012 at 9:16 PM
Great article and me too. Not going to to do any of it... Going to spend time with the hubby and do things instead of buying things. It is just the two of us, neither of us have an extended family and no kids. For the past few years I have really been thinking what is the point, so this year we just decided to not bother. So far it has felt a little akward, but really only when people ask about how our holiday plans are going. I am surprised by how many people wish they could skip Christmas
.... More
too.
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anonymous
Dotty Dec 02 2012 at 6:56 PM
I think holidays are completely overrated. They seem to be all about xmas and shopping. Forget thanksgiving now, its hardly a mention on store shelves or in the media. All one cares about is making money off of consumers. No one eats the food you cook, no one cares for the gifts you give. I'm not bitter just have realized it is a bit pointless now as my kids are grown, and I don't enjoy it anymore. This year, was the first year I got a cut tree and again, it doesn't seem to matter. Nothing changes.
.... More
I'm with you, after this year I am sitting it out for the forseeable future. :)
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d.wies's picture
d.wies Dec 02 2012 at 6:40 PM

I'm 54 years old with adult children. That means I've celebrated 50+ Halloweens, Thanksgivings and Christmases. From now on, I take a break every other year, doing what I call Holidays-lite. This year I'm going all out, next year, not so much. Time goes by so quickly now; celebrating big every other year feels right.

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divette2000's picture
divette2000 Dec 02 2012 at 3:26 PM

I love it! now that my son is older....this is exactly what we will be doing.

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christineandersonphoto's picture
christineanders... Dec 02 2012 at 1:46 PM

My husband and I have skipped Thanksgiving for the past eight years. We go hiking with the dogs, make homemade pizza, drink wine, and watch movies. It's completely stress free and we love it!

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anonymous
Beverly Nov 28 2012 at 9:38 PM

And you're all just kids compared to me. I opted out of the foolishness and nonsense a long time ago. Sometimes, just living is stressful enough without adding to it.

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svartan's picture
Starre Vartan Nov 28 2012 at 3:22 PM

Thanks for the well-wishes folks! I does seem like when things that are supposedly fun and joyful become obligation, that it's worth taking a second look at what their value is.

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anonymous
Jean Andrews Nov 28 2012 at 1:49 PM

Congratulations on your bravery! It sounds great. It may set a new trend in your life and into the future, or maybe you will miss all the craziness and people and vow never to opt out again. Will be interested to hear how it pans out. Enjoy the peace and solitude!

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kayleighmaijala
kayleighmaijala Nov 27 2012 at 9:31 PM

You and me, both! I totally agree: the social obligation is terrible in my Hawaiian family.. if you don't go then something is 'wrong' with you.
Enjoy your well deserved solitude-filled holiday season. Cheers! ;)

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