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Free bird: Thanksgiving turkey pardons

By: Russell McLendon on Nov. 26, 2019, 11:14 a.m.
A turkey army gathers in the 'South Park' episode 'Starvin' Marvin.'

Photo: South Park Studios

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When turkeys attack

Despite the apparent absurdity of politicians pardoning turkeys, it still might not be a bad idea. After all, considering everything else people put turkeys through, we could stand to build up a little goodwill in case they ever rise up against us, à la the genetically engineered turkeys in the "South Park" Thanksgiving special, "Starvin' Marvin." (Watch a clip from the episode here.)