Welcome to a new feature on the food blog - The Thursday food "nooooo." That's "nooooo" as in "no way", "no they didn't", or "no one in their right mind would buy that."

Sometimes it will be a food product. Sometimes it will be a kitchen tool. Sometimes it will be an ingredient. But, today, it's none of those things. Today it's a men's body spray. At least I hope it's supposed to be for men. Although it just shouldn't be at all.

Raise you hand if you've ever had the privilege of working in a fast food restaurant. Remember that smell in your hair? In your polyester uniform? The smell that, disgusting as it was, made everyone in your house hungry when you'd get home from work? It's available now in the form of FLAME by Burger King. Now, I'm pretty creative, but even I could not make this up. This is for real. A WHOPPER scented body spray.

The WHOPPER® sandwich is America’s Favorite burger. FLAME™ by BK® captures the essence of that love and gives it to you. Behold the scent of seduction, with a hint of flame-broiled meat.
When I first saw the website, I thought "this must be a joke. There isn't really a product. It's just a goofy promotion." But "nooooo," there is a link to purchase the product. I'm almost afraid to give it to you all for fear you might actually encourage them and buy it as a gag gift for someone. Resist the urge, I beg of you. Since blogging etiquette requires that I link to a site if I'm going to quote from it, here it is. But, there's no need for you to click.

I can only imagine that Burger King has its PR people writing the customer reviews for this product because it has a 5 star rating. Actually, the reviews are entertaining.

"Amanda" from Virginia Beach wrote:

I received Flame in the mail two days ago....yesterday I wore it to work for the first time. As a tattoo artist, our tip amounts vary greatly..... but yesterday not one tip was less than $50!!!!! I know it had everything to do with wearing flame....... THANK YOU! :)
"Frank" from Philadelphia wrote:
After viewing the commercial, I knew this spray had to be mine.  Once received, I engulfed my less than satisfactory body with your cow meat scent.  

At first, I was discouraged because the neighborhood dogs started chasing me as if they were in heat.  I made it inside just in time.  Soon after, my girlfriend came over.  

I was skeptical at first, but when she appeared from the kitchen, double fisting ketchup bottles, I knew I was golden.  Her love of hamburgers had finally worked out to my advantage.  

(I've truncated Frank's quote because he goes onto to describe how it worked out to his advantage, and really, you don't want to know.)

To tell the truth, while I'm no longer a customer at any fast food joints, I do have a special place in my heart for BK. They gave me my first job back in high school, and I worked there for two years. I had a lot of fun, and I learned a great deal about being a responsible employee from some fabulous managers. 

But this, this is just "nooooo!" 

Robin Shreeves ( @rshreeves ) focuses on food from a family perspective from her home base in New Jersey.

The Thursday food "nooooo"
Some things should never be. And a WHOPPER scented body spray is one of them.